Monday, March 12, 2018

Deep Thoughts: When Sex is Like Pizza

Recently it was brought to my attention that there is a conversation that still needs to take place, both with my girls and among my friends. That conversation happens to be about sex. It's one I had assumed I had already covered with my daughters. We had always had open and honest conversations about sex and dating. 

It turns out that this conversation never ends, and there is still a lot to to talk about. I found this out when we read a book called Girls & Sex:Navigating the Complicated New Landscape with my book group. This of course led to an animated discussion of what this "new landscape" might look like. Which led to a discussion of what changes need to come. 

I immediately talked to my daughter about some of the topics we covered. One which was female pleasure ignored as long as men were covered. This led to a conversation about masturbation with Sam in the car on the way to school. Let's just say we almost had a throw yourself from the car a la LadyBird. But it led to a short discussion and an agreement that we were both available for any further questions. 

The reading of the first book led to another book by Al Vernacchio. He wrote a book called For Goodness Sex which challenges the way we teach sex education. He is the sex educator that is proposing that we discuss sex with the metaphor of pizza rather than as baseball. We suggest we should be approaching sex in a way that is respectful and requires communication rather than competition.  I could never be as simply eloquent as him so I have attached a link to his Ted Talk here. I agree with him wholeheartedly. And who doesn't love pizza? 

What I have found so interesting when talking about this with friends is the response among them. It turns out we all need to continue to have conversations about sex. And there is always something to learn about how we approach it. I hope that the pizza model takes hold. And I hope we all continue to have open conversation about things that matter. 

Monday, March 5, 2018

Field Trip: Oscar Night at the Four Points by Sheraton

At some point a long time ago we got rid of our cable and never looked back, relying instead on Netflix, Hulu and Youtube to keep us up to date with our tv and movies. The only thing missing for me, and it's a big one, is awards shows. There's just something about the red carpet, and seeing all the artists being recognized for their art. This year's Oscars was one I was really interested in with movies that have both entertained us, and rocked us. 

Thankfully I have a loving husband who decided to treat me this year to cable in the funnest way possible. He set us up with an overnight stay at a nearby hotel with cable so that we could watch the 90th Academy Awards. We chose the Four Points by Sheraton Hotel since it's minutes away from home, has cable, and has a pool which is helpful for bribing our girls to bring us take-out if needed in exchange for swimming! 
This may sound kind of extreme but it wasn't too crazy. It has been a while since we took the time for a date night. And an overnight was fairly reasonable. 

To make it a celebration I packed along some unbreakable champagne glasses and my Valentine chocolates that had yet to be devoured. We brought along various movie treats though there is a chance of real movie popcorn if that bribing works. 

Though we are a typically active family, there is something so fun about getting into your jammies in the afternoon and just snuggling up and watching the red carpet and the Oscars. Our girls went and got us movie popcorn for an extra treat. And also a dinner of sushi!

The night was a really fun break in the stress of Steve starting a new job, Sam in the process of dealing with preparing college, and just all the stuff of life. Sometimes all we need is a little reset. Do you ever do something goofy like this? Please tell me if you have any fun ideas that we can use in the future! 

Monday, February 26, 2018

Deep Thoughts: How do you feel about Pot?

I live in Washington state, a place where the use of marijuana was legalized some time ago.  At first that felt like just a profusion of billboards all over town telling you the best place to shop for it. 

But now that things are calming down a bit there feels like a change is in the air. The hippie vibe is there if you want it, but there is also a sophistication and an education taking place. 

I recently met up with my friend Morgan of MOMAD productions to talk about many things, among them pot and it's place in our lives. She's incredibly tuned in, savvy and smart. Our conversation showed me that there are many involved conversations we could have, but I'll start with this. 

When do you think it will be the norm to go to a party and along with alcohol there will be offerings of different things to smoke, or edibles? I am picturing a day when instead of bar carts there are smoke carts, or tables. 

Maybe I should preface this with my own take on things. I grew up in California up until the 5th grade and my first memory of being around pot was being in a park and smelling an unusual scent. My mom told me that people were smoking "grass" and I thought they were literally picking grass and smoking! 

Once I hit High School I dated many guys that were into it and was in many situations (concerts, etc) where it was around but I just wasn't into it, only finally trying it again in my 20's. Once again I didn't find it that interesting so I only tried it twice. 

Now that it's all around us and legal I've been interviewing friends on their views on it and if they would either light up or partake at a party. Most say they wouldn't. Some say they would if depending on the host. Others that I would never suspect of being curious have said that they would try it on their own at home. 

This post is meant to be neither pro nor con on the subject. I just wonder how things will change. I have to admit to being naive and thinking when this lovely coffee shop we met up at, Trove Coffee opened I thought they might be selling pot infused lattes. They don't, though I did have a hemp milk latte. Some say that day isn't too far from now. 

I'm not sure if anyone would feel comfortable in commenting on this post but I am honestly wondering what you think. Do you feel like the gentrifying of pot will be a gradual thing? Or quicker than any of us expect? 

(ps. A shoutout to Trove Coffee who serve delicious coffee and awesome food from Avenue Bread and Wake & Bakery in a gorgeous setting!)

Monday, February 19, 2018

Field Trip: Dark Table in Vancouver, Canada

For Valentine's Day my husband took me on a delayed surprise trip to a surprise destination. Do you remember when dining in the dark was a trending thing? Steve found there is a restaurant doing just that in Vancouver. While it's no longer trendy it's still a fascinating and fun thing to try! We ended up at Dark Table

Of course all my photos are from outside. You are greeted outside, order from a menu there, then wait for your server to come and retrieve you. Steve found out there are five servers covering twenty-five tables. The cool thing is the workforce is mainly blind or visually impaired, making it a wonderful employer for the non-sighted in a tough job market. And the most able people to guide you in the experience. Once you enter thru the doors you are entirely in their hands. 

And that is when the adventure begins. The led us to the restrooms first (we had just driven up from Bellingham after all!). You travel thru curtains before hitting the bathrooms which have lowered lights. When we came back out to the curtained area we waiting in a scrum of people for our server to retrieve us. 

And though we really enjoyed the food, our server really made the evening for us. She was named Rose and told us to yell for her if we needed anything "just like on the Titanic!" She was hysterical and incredibly comfortable with us. She led us carefully thru the restaurant with hands on shoulders, flawlessly handed us drinks and food (both hot and cold) and made the meal incredibly fun. 

The cons of eating there? There were a couple of times when we had "air bites"...where we brought the fork up to our mouths and there was no food on it! The other thing we found that was funny was not being able to pace ourselves. When you were eating your dessert all of a sudden you realized you were done! 

The pros? One is you get to see if you know food like you think you do. You order your main course and drinks, then the rest is a surprise. We found we were pretty good at figuring out the ingredients in the salad. And maybe we figured out our dessert! 

And the best thing? An evening to fully focus on one another. We were fully unplugged. And there was nothing to distract us. We didn't find ourselves checking out what everyone was doing.  Just one another's voice across the table. And each others hand when we could find them! 

The waitress claimed that at least a couple a week has to leave because the dark is too much. And I can't even describe how dark it is! Do you think you would enjoy it? 

Monday, February 12, 2018

Field Trip: Skagit Skate

My sister and I have been working at getting our families together and meeting halfway between our two places. This made our latest get together at Skagit Skate a perfect halfway point. 

There is something so cool about taking your kids to do the things you did when you were young. My sister and I spent many weekends skating when we were young. Being California girls it was something that you did at a rink or on your street. But there was something special about being under the mirror ball with your favorite music playing. 

These things from our past are starting to disappear. The movie rental place that we have been going to for years is closing. There's nothing wrong with Netflix, but there was just something about shuffling around the rental place searching for the night's entertainment. At least our girls were able to enjoy a slice of our past for a couple of years! 

Thankfully our girls enjoy all the "old school" things.They find them fun and also incredibly photo worthy! So our time together is full of skating, eating, visiting and lots of photos. And my sister and I get to show off what little of our skating skills are left! 

And we get to watch our girls have just a taste of what life was like when we were kids. All of us goofing off together is just another crazy layer of life. We are hoping to continue on this track. Next time we are thinking bowling! 

Monday, February 5, 2018

Deep Thoughts: The Month of Love

Are you as relieved as I am that January is over? I wasn't sure if I would make it! There is something about the let down after the Holidays and the constant grey that can be the PNW in the wintertime. I'm thinking it may be time to invest in a happy light to get an extra boost. In the meantime I am so happy it is February so that I can distract myself with loving on the people I care about!

The first thing I do when February rolls around is get out some minor decorations. This might not be your typical decor, but it makes us all laugh and that's something we are all about this time of year! It distracts us from the weather, work and school. A sense of humor is what gets us out of bed on the daily! 

Another thing that I start to think about is some treats for our girls. Now that they are older the things I pick may change though there is usually a novelty item in there for the family. I can't say too much to ruin the surprise, but it's so much fun to think about what would make them smile. I can say Kate is really into cooking, and Samantha is all about experimenting with make up so their gifts will probably reflect that. We will have a family dinner with Sam that will include some type of fondue.  And of course chocolate.

There are also some "galentine" plans in the works. It's the perfect time of year to spoil friends and co-workers with small treats or snacks. Again I can't say too much, but I find the planning part of the fun. It gives me something to look forward to and just look at these cute plates I picked up at Spruce! They scream girlfriends don't they? 

Another thing I will be busy with is sending some happy mail. I have had some friends reach out to me recently with sweet texts or calls and it's meant more to me than I can even say. Somehow they have come at just the right time. I'm hoping to return the favor with some sweet mail that will go out with these gorgeous stamps designed by Anna Rifle. It's a lovely detail that makes things a bit more special. 

I know many get down on Valentines as a goofy holiday, putting pressure on those that aren't in relationships, and those that are. I find it's a good time to let those around me know how much they mean to me. And hey, there's nothing wrong with chocolates! 

How do you feel about Valentines? Do you love it? Hate it? Do you have any fun ways of celebrating it? Please share.  And I wish you love and chocolates! 

Monday, January 29, 2018

On my Radar: Goodreads

When it's grey, dreary and rainy outside there is a good bet you can find me immersed in a book. It's where I go when I need to escape from the weather, from myself, from everything. When Steve is feeling extra sweet he will even serve me dinner in my favorite spot on the couch, in my favorite jammies. And usually there is a stinky dog curled up beside me and I couldn't be happier. 

I've been a reader since I was young and in this age of tech I have found an app that is really useful in tracking books I want to read and also see what friends are reading. And since I have found reviews by others so helpful (and sometimes entertaining!) I have tried to write short reviews of my own. The app is Goodreads and I have it on both my computer and phone. Anytime I hear of a book I want to remember to read I can add it to my shelf. And thankfully my library has an app where I can request books to be placed on hold so they go hand in hand! 

And then it's off to the library to bring in a haul of books! I tend to not buy books anymore unless I really love it, or it's a design or a beautiful coffee table book. Otherwise it's really wonderful to be able to have the library to have the access to all these wonderful reads! 

I'm also part of a book group that has me reading books that I would never know to reach for. I have found myself being challenged by new topics, new ways of seeing the world, and touched by stories I would never know I was missing out on. 

And anytime I am looking for inspiration there are also beautiful books to be found. I will occasionally pull cookbooks too, though I tend to go for fiction most of the time. Are you on Goodreads? I would love to be connected to you there! And have you read anything lately that you would care to share about? Please do!